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I have nothing but the nicest things to say about most of them . It’s normal to feel a little jealous, but there’s no point in getting too insecure because this will happen after show. If I’m in a relationship with someone, I of course want to support their career, but going to a bunch of gigs, especially ones that are late at night, can be a pretty hearty time commitment. Speaking as one of those people, it takes awhile to develop thick skin. This is another fact: unless he and his bandmates are explicitly sober, they’re going to be around alcohol and probably drugs, too, and oftentimes getting it for free. This is a saying from my friend, our former “Mind Of Man” columnist John De Vore.

Don’t take my swearing-off musicians as a warning, per se. They have intense relationships with their band mates that will be more important to them than the relationship they have with you. It’s a wonder anyone in a band has time for a romantic relationship given how much time they spend bickering with each other over big egos, women, money, and God knows what else. So handle with care: the sweet, sensitive guy who writes you love songs is also going to be sensitive about that nasty Pitchfork commenter. Your musician boo may not write songs about you, exactly, but about your relationship or love in general.

On the contrary, my loss is your gain — the more for you! Whether it’s an all-out Axl Rose and Slash situation or more of a slow-simmering Keith Richards and Mick Jagger resentment, band bros have more drama than the “Real Housewives” cast.

But this will get more fucking annoying for you than the girls or the dudes in his band.

I love what I do, and I’m lucky enough to be business oriented with the opportunity to live in the moment. Five months ago the keyboard player was going to move in with me and my boyfriend. We still talk for hours every day, have incredible sex, and instead of harming each others careers like we feared, we’re actually making each others lives better.

Now we’re both stable again and things are confusingly wonderful. We harshly make fun of one another’s dates and always take each other’s advice when it comes to ditching someone who isn’t good for us. I’m not the kind of person who needs to be affirmed by my relationships, and it seems that the strong boundaries of our “relationship” work so well because they are elusive and undefined, no mess no fuss.

Instead of freaking the eff out, I was pretty chill about it. As I said, I didn’t think it was romanticals, but at one point I was so into the idea that maybe it was, I started reading into these messages.

Soon enough, you’ll realize that it’s okay to skip a show. When you’ve been at it for long, though, watching him play at the usual bar (his “office”) will, at some point, kind of feel like him watching you type on your computer as you tinker with an Excel worksheet. Even if you’re not the type, you’re sure to be so overcome with pride at some point in his career that you’ll patiently wait backstage, camera, water bottle, and extra t-shirt in hand to support him. ” notes right away, but he will as soon as he steps off-stage—and he’ll love you for it! Of course, when he’s onstage swinging a guitar or serenading an audience, he won’t be able to read your “I love you, babe! Wherever they’re invited to play, there you’ll be, so you’re sure to hang out where you normally wouldn’t even think of going, say, a small campus in a new city, a new bar in your neighborhood, or a huge field out of town. Not only do you get to watch his band and others, you get to do so backstage, side stage, and, sometimes, even on the stage. Speaking of, you’ll definitely have your stage girlfriend moments. No suffocating in crowds or elbowing your way through a mosh pit.




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